Acts of Courage

By: Debbie Clarke Crispo

A more courageous woman you will never find,than the one who leaves it all behind.
She laughs in the face of adversity, for she is attending “Hard Knocks University”.
She walks down a lonely road, her heart bears a heavy load. Should she stay or should she go, she hears him coming – Oh no….

He can be so loving and so kind,Maybe she will trust him just one more time.
He always cries and says he’s sorry, He says he’ll change and not to worry.
She wants to leave, but is not sure when. He batters her spirit once again.
She walks down a lonely road, her heart bears a heavy load. Should she stay or should she go, she hears him coming – Oh no….

As her children cry, her resolve gets stronger.She can’t let them see this very much longer. The sun comes up and the day begins. How much longer should she pay for her sins? She dresses the children and sends them to school, her batterer cries and says he’s a fool.
She makes him lunch and sends him to work,She reflects on last night, and thinks she is the jerk. If she puts on some makeup, and keeps the house clean, maybe he’ll come home and not be so mean. He comes home from work, and they don’t even fight. He takes her in his arms and says he’ll make it right.
She goes on with life, doing the best that she can.Her husband is good (he’s become a new man.).
The children are playing and making some noise.He say’s he can’t take it and goes out with the boys. He’s been gone for two days now, and worrying is no fun. When he arrives, there’s no time to run.
She walks down a lonely road, her heart bears a heavy load. Should she stay or should she go? She hears him coming - Oh no..
He batters her face and tears at her clothes,She bears the abuse, but a secret she knows… All those nights he was gone, (the hours were many) left her enough time to talk to Penny. When she called the hot line, she was very unsure. She thought for abuse, there wasn't a cure. Penny told her to work, and every nickel to save, and when she was ready to leave, she should be very brave. She walks down a lonely road, her heart bears a heavy load. Should she stay or should she go, she hears him coming – Oh no….
She packed up her children, and ran like the wind! Finally she realized she hadn’t sinned. She ran to a shelter, and empowerment she did find! For once in her life, she had peace of mind. She worked very hard and went to school, for never again would she be played for a fool. She has a safe home now, and her children are well; she has left behind their living hell.

She laughs in the face of adversity, for she has graduated from “Hard Knocks University”! A more courageous woman you will not find, Than the one who left it all behind.

Indulge!

Combine wine, cheese, chocolate and add a group of amazing supporters and speakers and you’ll get a recipe for a night of indulgence! On February 11^th, we did just so! We hosted our first annual chocolate and wine celebration, Indulge! , to celebrate self-sufficiency and economic empowerment.  We raised over $6,000, which will fund 12 Self- Sufficiency Grants. These grants empower survivors of domestic violence to rebuild their dreams; they are used for:  housing stabilization, education, computers, child care, transportation, health care and micro-financing small businesses. With our pay-it-forward philosophy, the proceeds of this event will help us touch the lives of 48 survivors of domestic violence. We also awarded two grantees with the Woman of the Web award.

There was also a silent auction consisting of over 35 donated items, including gift certificates, jewelry and big ticket items such as a vacation to Barbados and Red Soxs tickets. Music was played by a beautiful harpist, Nancy Kleiman.  Food and flowers were generously donated from local businesses including:  Roche Bros, the Kueh’s, Trader Joe’s, Stop & Shop, Paradise Bakery, Papa Gino’s, Bertucci’s, Edible Arrangements, Harry & David’s, Yama, Costco, and Taza.

Silent auction item were generously donation by: Treat Cupcake Bar, The Elephant Walk, Blue Ginger Restaurant, Wahlburgers, Alma Nové ,  Square Café,   A Matter of Brilliance, Elizabeth Grady, Yama Restaurant, Margaritas ,  Johnnies on the Side, Milestone Restaurant, JP Licks, Trader Joe’s, 1-800-Baskets, Quebrada, Purple Ink Insurance Agency, Ardan Salon,  Ideal Barber, Sculpture Day Spa, Bravo Baskets,  Tom James Co., Laser Skin Care Solutions, Jillian’s Lucky Strike, Tennessee’s BBQ, Wagon Wheel,  Captain Marden’s,  Victory Lane Restaurant, FreshCity, Whole Foods, Anne Goh, Debbie Crispo, Debbie Gray, Sue Ellen Harwood, and Lee Laraby.

Web of Benefit would like to thank all the participants, donors, and volunteers. None of it would have been possible without your help and support!

Happy Birthday to Us!

What a monumental day. We have reached our 1,000th grant and our 7th year anniversary of giving grants. In total over the last seven years, we have touched the lives of over 4000 women through our grants and pay-it-forward philosophy! We want to thank all of our collaborators, funders, volunteers, team, and donors for all the support through the years. Together we are changing lives and empowering women to rebuild their dreams. Thank you!

A Grantee Story

In February 2012, one of our grantees, Angela, received a laptop and a small amount of micro-financing for her new public speaking business from Web of Benefit .She is on her way to becoming a minister and inspiring women in Chicago and beyond. She is also writing a book to help women realize their dreams. Below is Angela's Story.  If you are interested in having Angela inspire your audience, please contact us at info@webofbenefit.org

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When I was five my first monster showed up, its name was (sexual) abuse.  When I was ten my second monster arrived his name is (verbal/mental) abuse.   At the age of eighteen I experienced an unprovoked attack.   I was a rape victim.  Many memories of my childhood were lost.  Several years cannot be accounted for.  I lost the distinction between what was real and unreal. When I had awakened (meaning what my life had become) I was experiencing the worst monster of them all (My reality). I’ll call this monster Life.
 
Allow me to introduce myself  my name is Angela. I’m a single mother raising and supporting my 3 daughters and son.  In all I have 6 children, all but three have the same father. My children have been my inspiration and my biggest fans. July 27, my first grand daughter was born. She became my motivation for life, As I look back on that day.  Her future flash before my eyes. A decision was made to make a difference in my life as well as my children. I couldn’t bear to lose another generation to the environment, and the condition under which I have lived and survived.    

I dropped out of school in the 10^th grade,  I returned to school on many occasion unable to complete the course.  I left hoping to one day return. Over the years I continued to struggle with my education. Without a high school diploma the doors of opportunity began to close one by one and the future for me was gone.  Eventually I turned to thoughts of suicide, depression, loneliness and mental illness. Working below my own potential, I accepted jobs that would perceive about 15% of my household. My household total gross was about 90%.   


My family has been through homelessness, three times living within government housing/ programs, evictions, utility cut offs and tragedies that you could only imagine in your nightmares. I realize one thing through-out all of this: I was lost in the system.   


At the age of 20 my life spiraled out of control.  I looked for help there was none to be found.  There was no one to look at as a role model, no big sister, and no mentors. I was left to understand life on my own terms. 
  
I have enjoyed working on several events regarding the experience concerning racism, homelessness, domestic /sexual violence. I have had the pleasure of being among the International Group Toast Masters, and the foundation of my strength comes from my membership with Labor of Love and Apostolic Deliverance Churches. 


38 years ago I died Mentally, Emotionally, Spiritually. My first encounter of sexual abuse took place in a dark room Most of my life I was locked in a mental hell. I have decided to share my life and my story because of that little girl who lost herself so long ago. November 10, 2011 at 7: 00 pm during one of my profound speaking event that little girl walked out of that room and my destiny has begun. 
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Through Web of Benefit's Self-Sufficiency Grant Program, women like Angela are given the financial support and mentoring in order to rebuild their dreams and create lives free of abuse for themselves and their families.  To donate to Web of Benefit, click here: webofbenefit.org/DONATE

Women's Support : Becoming Our Own Role Models

There was a time where women stood together in a bond of sisterhood, women supporting women.

"As women embrace the fullness of who they are as individuals, they may find themselves supporting other women, helping others to reach the level of inner comfort and outer freedom that they themselves have found. Among those who are less sure of themselves and their place in the world, it may be more common to criticize other women than to seek their help. But there are things that a woman can only learn from another woman, as there are things about being a man that can only be learned from other men. We all recognize that we have much to learn from each other regardless of gender, but sometimes we could use a supportive role model that gives us a more precise example of what and who we can become.

There was a time where women stood together in a bond of sisterhood, women supporting women. It is only natural that the pendulum swings out of balance for a while so that we may have the experience of what we do not want. It is up to women to bring the pendulum back into balance and bring back the sacred sisterhood we yearn for at our core.

If we envision a world where women support each other and help each other find their place in an ever-changing world, then we can become the change we want to see. Jealousy, envy, criticism, and judgment are refuges for the insecure. As we help others to become self-assured, we create a world in which all people help each other, regardless of gender. Only women can make the change in how women are seen and understood, not just by other women but by the world at large. The way we speak about each other to other women and to the men in our lives informs everyone to treat us with the respect that all women, and all people, deserve."- Daily Om